So It Ain’t Exactly Heaven: Heavenly Friday Fictonaires

Lou and Bud are at it again. This time it’s hell for Lou. But then again, with Bud, everything is hell for Lou.

Each week Rochelle Wisoff-Fields posts a pic to write a 100 word story about

This week it’s heaven and humor.

14-11-21  So It Aint exactly heaven pic
 
So It Ain’t Exactly Heaven

This is heaven, Bud?
Absolutely.
You sure?
Certainly.
It doesn’t look like heaven, Bud.
You’ve never been there, Lou. How would you know?
I don’t.
There you go.
I would’a liked some dancing girls.
D’you think God would have dancing girls?
No. But I never pictured the Michelin man.
Lou, where’s your mind?
In bed sleeping where I belong.
You belong?
Yes, Bud. I belong in bed.
What if you’re not in bed?
Huh?
What if you’re someplace lower?
Lower than my bed?
Someplace hotter?
Now you’re scaring me, Bud.
Think about it, Lou.
Listen. Bud. I don’t want a Michelin man, a lower place, a hotter place. I just want my bed, and maybe some dancing girls.
So you’re back to that again, Lou?
Back to what? I just wanna go back to sleep. AAAABBBBOTTTTT!!!!!!.

Randy Mazie

I’m over 100 words, but I didn’t have the heart to cut any more.
Put me on the overage (that’s overage – not over age) list with Perry Block.

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35 thoughts on “So It Ain’t Exactly Heaven: Heavenly Friday Fictonaires

  1. I’m pretty sure Perry is on both of those lists. Whatever you do don’t believe him when…well, basically when he says or does anything. He’s a tricksy one, that Perry.

    Also, funny story!

    • Well, thank you Sir Ickes.

      (Perry, did you read this ____? Remember Vinnie from terd street in Canarsie. Yeah. Him. Maybe you-know-who needs a little Vinnie Visit and a little heavenly discussion without any dancing goils. Whaddya tink, Perry?)

  2. Dear Randy,

    What I want to know is who’s on first? I enjoyed your hellishly heavenly story. Unless your story goes over two pages I don’t generally notice the overage. And who said anything about over age? Vintage maybe. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  3. Randy, Dancing girls could go to heaven if they’re the type with hearts of gold. Bud and Lou bring back happy memories. I saw them in person and got their autographs one year when there was a Soap Box Derby in Akron, Ohio. My cousin’s dad used to help out and she had a lot of autographs she’d collected. Good, well-written, and amusing story. ๐Ÿ™‚ — Susan

    • Wow. I’m smiling to read that you actually saw them in person and got their autograph. I have so much respect for their art. They were masters of stand up, timing, and staying in persona.
      And you’re so right. If your heart is pure, then you can get to go any where.
      Randy

  4. Randy,
    I suppose for some people a greasy garage could be heaven. For me, make it a coffee shop with big comfy chairs, free coffee and bagels and no Wifi so I can write. I love the snappy back and forth dialogue. You did it well.
    -David

    • Thank you.
      So you know, Mac’s greasy spoon on 10 st and Elm, down the block from Michelin Heaven, doesn’t have Wi-fi. Of course, they don’t even know what a bagel is, and the grease has built up so much on the tables that your elbows will slide off and you have to also be careful as you walk not to slide. But the colorful towns folks will give you plenty to write home about.
      Randy

  5. “You know, Lou, here in heaven we have a baseball team.”
    “Well, tell me, Abbott, what are the names of the players on the team?”
    “Who’s on first, What’s on second, God’s on third but only until I don’t know is off the disabled list.”

    As for the “overage” and “over-age” lists – as Adam suspected – I’m on both lists. And, know what? I’M A B-A-A-D-D-D BOY!

    Thanks for the cool use of Abbott and Costello, Randy.

  6. Funny dialogue. Bounces all over the place, just like they did it. I can’t imagine what it was in the prompt that made you think of heaven, but I guess it’s a very personal thing. Most enjoyable.

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