Betcha wouldn’t want to have this person’s job…
Friday Fictioneers – Rochelle Wisoff-Fields posts a pic each week to write a 100 word story about.
This week, it’s humor (funny, it was humor the week before, and the week before that, and the week before…)
Copyright-Roger Bultot
The Ivy Leaf Trucking Company
Act 73, Scene 1
The same scene every morning,
An old office in a trucking company, with a weary receptionist answering the phones, trying to sound helpful. Let’s listen in…
Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?
No, ma’am this is not Harvard University, and no, we are not Ivy League, we are Ivy Leaf, and we cannot help your child get into Harvard. No, not Yale. Not even Brooklyn College. Sorry. Got to go.
Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?
No, I did not say, “I relieved”. I said, “Ivy Leaf”. (looking at the phone) Sorry to piss you off, ha, but you didn’t have to slam the phone down on me like that. Same to you, buddy
Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?
No, sorry, we do not sell ivy vines, plants, flowers. No, we are not a nursery.
Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?
(looking around her to see if anyone is listening) No, Sam, just ’cause we did it in the truck last night, and by the way, you were very good, I can personally guarantee you will not get poison ivy. Got to go, phones are crazy.
Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?
No, this is not the poison ivy hotline.
Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?
Yes, you are quite astute. We did put one of our older trucks out front with ivy growing on it as a way to advertise and attract attention to our TRUCKING service. I said TRUCKING. It starts with a “T”, not an “F”. Listen, you horny old bastard, I’m hanging up on you right now.
Randy Mazie
Please forgive my word excess this week, but I couldn’t see myself cutting any of the responses. Thanks, R.
The Writer's Village 
Pretty cool! Good to see someone using more words than me too! Ha! 😀
Ivy league Trucking Company. Can I help you?
Hilarious! Loved it! 🙂
Ivy league Trucking Company…
hilariousness is our specialty.
Randy, Well, that was different. Very creative and humorous, if a little R-rated. Sounds like there’s a bit of a bad connection. 🙂 —Susan
Ivy league Trucking Company…
our x-rated answers are $5.00 and you can call our 1-900 number….
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Randy, you’re cup runneth over. But since it’s hilarious you’re forgiven.
Ivy league Trucking Company… forgiveness is our desire.
Wherest your cup runneth over, our trucks won’t.
So this is why the name of a company is so important. 🙂 This receptionist would be great to talk to at a party, with all her stories about crazy calls.
Want to party in our Ivy Leaf Model truck? I just dumped Sam.
We could create some of our own great stories partying out there tonight.
Hahahahaha…I’m happy you didn’t cut any of that out! This is really entertaining & funny!
Thanks.
Creative take on the prompt. You made me giggle. Your word count might make Rochelle get out her pruning shears though. 🙂
Since she’s a baker, it would probably be her cookie cutter…..
Hi – do you deliver grapes ?
Dear Randy,
Ivy Leaf What-ing company. Oh…phones lines…hard to hear sometimes. Guess I’ll leaf it alone. Funny.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Did you just call? I saw your number on our phone.
Can we help with hauling something?.
You know, you call, we haul.
Sorry you’re not home at the moment, but please feel free to leaf that message again.
LOL Well then… fun use of the prompt.
well then… I’m glad you felt prompted to comment.
Please prompt on back again. 😉
Randy
Bravo. Ivey enough of all this.
too bad.
I was rooting for you to ask for more.
Randy
lol that was hilarious and very imaginative. didn’t mind the extra words at all 🙂
thank you for your generosity, KZ.
I’ll try to do my next story in 50 words or less as penance.
Randy
Sounds like her rendezvous with Sam was observed 🙂 Funny!
was that you peeping, draliman.
Such a naughty boy.
🙂
Randy,,, There are many mistakes to be made from the name Ivy leaf… I guess in the end it will be jail instead of Yale…
I might bail before jail….
It’s not easy to be funny, yet you manage to make me laugh week after week. Thank you.
Ha. now that’s funny…..
(thanks, Randy)
Truckingly imaginative. Loved it! Excess words and all…
Thank you.
That’s me… one imaginative mother trucker.
Randy
Excesses forgiven this week. I mean, really, who doesn’t understand the frustrations of handling the phones? Kind of makes a great comedy monologue. Bravo, Randy!
Thank you, wm.
d’you need any thing trucked?
Randy
nonetheless, the extra words added in extra flavours! 🙂
uh-oh. Does that mean I have to eat my words. 😉
thanks for commenting.. Randy
Started my day out with a smile (and a laugh). Ivy Leaf Company – do you make house calls????
House calls are our specialty.
You call, we haul.
I be hauling my a** anywhere you want it.
Randy
Too funny! 🙂 I was once upon time receptionist. It can be a fun as well as frustrating job. I was not good at it.I found out I was getting fired when I answered calls from gals applying for the job.
😦
Lily
oops.
Now there’s company that is sensitive to its employee’s feelings.
Dear Randy – Priceless skit! I love it and enjoyed the overage on your word count! Laughed and laughed! Good for you! Hilarious and very witty! Nan 🙂
glad you enjoyed it. Randy
That poor receptionist needs to change her job if she’s not to go mad. Very funny.
Waddya mean, i got her from the local asylum.
Who else would take the job.
Randy
Haha…you were just having too much fun with that one!
Us boys, I mean, girls just wanna have fun…
Randy
Bravo, Randy. Personally, We prefer fig leaves. They provide a little more cover.
yours truly, Adam & Eve
Glad you didn’t cut any of the responses just to fit the 100. Very entertaining. You could go on and on with this, couldn’t you? I like the last one best! 🙂
yup, I could have. thanks for reading and commenting.
Randy