The Ivy Leaf Trucking Company: The Friday Ivy League Fictioneers

Betcha wouldn’t want to have this person’s job…

Friday Fictioneers โ€“ Rochelle Wisoff-Fields posts a pic each week to write a 100 word story about.

This week, it’s humor (funny, it was humor the week before, and the week before that, and the week before…)

Copyright-Roger Bultot

Copyright-Roger Bultot


 
The Ivy Leaf Trucking Company

Act 73, Scene 1
The same scene every morning,
An old office in a trucking company, with a weary receptionist answering the phones, trying to sound helpful. Let’s listen in…

Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?

No, ma’am this is not Harvard University, and no, we are not Ivy League, we are Ivy Leaf, and we cannot help your child get into Harvard. No, not Yale. Not even Brooklyn College. Sorry. Got to go.

Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?

No, I did not say, “I relieved”. I said, “Ivy Leaf”. (looking at the phone) Sorry to piss you off, ha, but you didn’t have to slam the phone down on me like that. Same to you, buddy

Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?

No, sorry, we do not sell ivy vines, plants, flowers. No, we are not a nursery.

Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?

(looking around her to see if anyone is listening) No, Sam, just ’cause we did it in the truck last night, and by the way, you were very good, I can personally guarantee you will not get poison ivy. Got to go, phones are crazy.

Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?

No, this is not the poison ivy hotline.

Ivy Leaf Trucking Company. Can I help you?

Yes, you are quite astute. We did put one of our older trucks out front with ivy growing on it as a way to advertise and attract attention to our TRUCKING service. I said TRUCKING. It starts with a “T”, not an “F”. Listen, you horny old bastard, I’m hanging up on you right now.

Randy Mazie

Please forgive my word excess this week, but I couldn’t see myself cutting any of the responses. Thanks, R.

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50 thoughts on “The Ivy Leaf Trucking Company: The Friday Ivy League Fictioneers

  1. Pingback: The Rest Stop ~Friday Fictioneers 8/22/14 | DCTdesigns Creative Canvas

  2. Excesses forgiven this week. I mean, really, who doesn’t understand the frustrations of handling the phones? Kind of makes a great comedy monologue. Bravo, Randy!

  3. Too funny! ๐Ÿ™‚ I was once upon time receptionist. It can be a fun as well as frustrating job. I was not good at it.I found out I was getting fired when I answered calls from gals applying for the job.
    ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

    Lily

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