Ah, What is Happiness, Grasshopper? Friday Fictioneer

Sometimes things aren’t what they seem. So don’t break anyone’s chop sticks until you’ve walked a while through their noodles…

Friday Fictioneers โ€“ Rochelle Wisoff-Fields posts a pic each week to write a 100 word story about.

This week, it’s humor (funny, it was humor the week before, and the week before that, and the week before…)

Copyright โ€“ Marie Gail Stratford

Copyright โ€“ Marie Gail Stratford

 
One Man’s Fortune is Another Man’s Misfortune

Got laid off from my job slatherin’ ribs at Red’s Barbecue.
Didn’t know what I’d do next. But I had a wit and a sharp tongue.
Picked up work at the local chopstick labeling company, ‘cept I can’t write.
I’d jest tell the dude somethin’, and he’d type into that thar labeler.

He’d gussy it up fortune-cookie style.
But one time, he changed it ’round completely.

I said:

“Happiness is a side of pork, people.”

He typed:

“It is happiness enough to know that one is superior to the fork people.”

Fork people? Needless to say, I quit.
Hell, I don’t know what that meant, but it sounded too nasty fer me.

Randy Mazie

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47 thoughts on “Ah, What is Happiness, Grasshopper? Friday Fictioneer

  1. Perhaps the typist is losing his hearing, and not gussying it up at all. ๐Ÿ™‚
    Nice tale. I hope he finds some more satisfying work in the near future.

    • Happy for laughs, always,
      Chinese people funny people.
      When they say fork people, they mean fork people – kosher or otherwise.

      PS this guy couldn’t write fortunes for cookies, because he couldn’t handle the way the unfortunate ways that the cookie crumbles.

      Sayonara.
      randy-san

  2. Good one Randy. I guess he just didn’t have a forking sense of humour ๐Ÿ˜‰ lol. Loved the pace and light comedic feel in your story.

    Cheers.

    • As in Monty Hall Let’s Make a Deal? Or FDR’s New Deal?
      or are you just sitting around playing poker and accidentally typed what you were saying to your compadres?
      Anyways, do you deal in half deals?
      I prefer big deals – which, as you can see, I making this.
      Ha.

      Randy

      BTW thanks for commenting… loved the words you dealt me.

  3. Okay —- forkingtastic this is!

    Loved it — the entire voice, narration, style, wit … and dang, now I’m hungry for ribs – cause mine have been tickled ๐Ÿ˜‰

    (groaning in bad penned punmenship)

    Seriously … ribs …. must consider ribs …. Sweet and Sour perhaps?

  4. For the Chinese, happiness is a side of pork and is it kosher to say that about fork people? ๐Ÿ™‚ This grasshopper is still finding her way…

    Lily

    • Dear grasshopper,
      For a happy side of pork, go to Red’s Barbecue.
      For kosher side of pork, must speak with Rabbi Roshi.
      Is it kosher to say, happiness is a side of pork to fork people?
      I don’t think that really that forks people at all – whether kosher or not.
      What really forks people is three (or four) stainless steels tines in the flesh.
      Hope that answers all of your questions, grasshopper.

      Now, please, a job for my protagonist would be much appreciated….
      Randy

  5. Randy, I think just about everything, and I do mean everything, has been said in the above comments. I’m aftaid I don’t have a job for you protagonist. I’m sure he’ll find something as he has you for a friend. I’m sure you’re working for his best interests. Humorous and well written. ๐Ÿ™‚ —Susan

    • Really?
      Wanna leave Melanie and be with me? Or better yet, why donโ€™t you, me and Melanieโ€ฆ well, weโ€™ll talk later.

      Just ribbingโ€ฆ. ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Thanks for commenting. Hope youโ€™re having fun.
      Randy

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