Wasn’t that title: Annie, get your goat? That slogan: Goat for the gold? Where do goats vacation? In a goat-tel.
Friday Fictioneers – it’s not just for Fridays anymore.
Rochelle Wisoff-Fields posts a pic (this week it’s mine!) to write a 100 word story about. But don’t let it get your goat!
It’s humor time again!!!!!
Randy Mazie @ The Writers Village
Making Goat Money: Two 100 Words or Less Goat Tails
I. Billy’s World Famous Goat Ranch
I wear a goatee.
I call everyone “old goats”.
I yell at everyone that they’re “really getting my goat”.
My favorite expression? Go to it! Which sounds like “Goat to it.”
My name is Billy. Laugh all you want.
My last name is Idol.
Don’t ask me if I’m unemployed. Is Billy Idol?
Old joke – along with Billy the Kid.
So, my friend, now that we got all that put aside – let me know which one you like. I’ll give you for a real good price for the night. A little doe for little dough. Now, that’s funny.
II. Don’t Let Them Get Your Goats: Be Happy!
It was my backyard. I had no work. For a while I raised goats hoping I’d make a little something selling goat meat. It cost more to raise them than I got from selling them,
Money don’t come easy. So I turned the backyard into a cemetery.
People pay good money to die.
Now I’m happy. Dead people happy. And me goats are now happy, too.
Randy Mazie
The Writer's Village 
Dear Randy,
How goat-tesque! I really preferred the second to the first. Now that I’ve commented I’ll go enjoy some ri-goat-a cheese.
shalom,
Rochelle
Oh. I like ri-goat-a cheese too.
Did you hear about the doe who had triplets and named them: Goat A, Goat B, and Goat T?
Goat away, Randy
I like the second better too; very clever!
And thank you for providing a great photo!
Wow.
Thank you for looking at it and appreciating it. I also want to thank the goat, the man in the background, the people who died allowing me to have their tombs in my picture, my producer, and my mother for allowing me to become the person who I am today. I also thank my many fans, I thank God, and Ms. Wisoff our sponsor.
Randy
And you’re very clever, too, comment #2 on story #2
I can’t say which was my favourite, I enjoyed both.
Oh, a wiseguy, can’t say, huh? Nyuk, Nyuk. Nyuk.
What are you a politician? Afraid to get my goat by choosing?
Well, you just get down off your high fence, Missy Z.
Sometimes in life you got to make a choice.
Go ahead make my day. Is your #1 my #2, or will we both make #1 #1 together.
Ha, this is so much fun…
Hi Randy,
Loved the photo this week, although it was tough to come up with a story I liked from it. Of yours, I preferred the second one – seems more like a complete tale.
Yay, that’s two votes for one. One for two.
It seems that my #1 is your #2.
Did that come out right?
Randy
That is funny. The first story, I mean. I like the play on words.
I like word play too. Maybe three. What was the first story about?
Goats in the cemetery–that’s one way to keep the weeds and brush trimmed but they’re not too fond of grass so you still need a lawn mower. I’m very fond of “corn” so #1 is my favorite (although you have to careful not to feed too much corn to goats).
Well, there you are mon. You’re hired. I’m expanding me cemetery around de Island, mon – and I need a knowledgeable worker like you. Drop me a line and I’m sure we can work sumptin’ out. Fancy you. Corn indeed.
You really goat something here. i won’t goad you on any further.
Oh, goad on… Randy
Those were both excellent — I’m a sucker for bad puns, so the first one wins out in my book.
There’s a sucker born for every tale. (just teasing) Randy
So punny 🙂
So true
Dead people happy! A newly invented form of happiness! Ha!
I like happy dead people. I thought everybody does.
I hate miserable ghosts, kvetching spirits, and nagging phantoms.
Be dead, man, and be happy! I say. Randy
Gosh you’re an upbeat guy! 😀
😉
People pay good money for a place to park their carcass for sure. A great and challenging picture Randy.
I thought it was great when I visited the cemetery in Jamaica, seeing the goats and the graveyard and the people resting on the tombs in the shade… Thought it would be interesting fodder for stories. Randy
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I’m not going to horn in on the humor and puns flying around here. I just ask that you check the “wether” next time.
janet
Wither weather or wether whither or whether weather you be wondering about, Carl Weathers? Mrs. Weathers wondered.
Wether may refer to:
A castrated male goat
ouch….
and a castrated female goat?
Or is that too political?
No reason to fix them as they’re raised for milk and kids. 🙂 And if the males that aren’t needed for breeding are castrated, there’s no need. Ouch, eh?
Ouch, yeah.
You know a lot about goats. From being married to one? (Sorry Bill, I couldn’t resist it!)
You silly old goat,(my mother used to call my dad that) I loved this, go for the puns every time!
Not too goat-esque?
Not wishing to “horn in” on this conversation, but this really kicks it in the “butt.”
Okay, WMQ, don’t go “butt”ering me up… ha. Thanks for the horney comments.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I know what’s on YOUR mind tonight! 😉
Not much… on it, in it, or of it.
lots of groans and lots of laughs, and maybe a bleat or two.
“A bleat or two”… I love that line.
Makes my heart bleat.
Glad you had a verbal time. Sounds like fun. Randy
and the goats get to keep the weeds down / a win win
Are the goats doing weed again? he asked.
Mon, we work hard growing ganja ‘tween de graves.
Goats can’t be chewin’ up de proffets, ya know.
Where’s me shot gun, Shirley-girl?
Silly old goat! I got a much needed chuckle out of this piece. Well done.
Hey, did you just call me a silly old goat?
Little Johnny’s goat was hit by a car, and unfortunately, died. Mom and dad tried their best to console their young son. “You know, Johnny, it’s not your fault the goat died, it was just fate.”
But Little Johnny would have none of it.
So, in a last gasp attempt, Little Johnny’s dad said, “He’s probably up in Heaven right now with God. He’ll be happy there, so you don’t have to feel bad anymore.”
Little Johnny asked, “What would God want with a dead goat?
And little Johnny’s father raised a menacing eyebrow, and bellowed at his son, “Who are you to question God?”
And little Johnny bellowed back, “You taught me to question everything, father.”
“Well,” the father backed off, “in that case, maybe God doesn’t really need a dead goat. Do you want one, son?”
“What a marone!” Johnny slapped himself in the head, then shook it from side-to-side, and declared, “Dad, you need to stop smoking that stuff. And if you did, maybe you wouldn’t have hit the goat in the first place.”
lol !
The second one made people in the bus look at me in a strange way
wow. So you read it to the people on the bus? Cool.
No I started laughing while reading it…
Next time, read it to them, so they won’t think you so strange.
Maybe stand up and announce, “Ladies and Gentlemen, if I may have your attention, please. I have something humorous to read to you.”
You could end up on an emty bus and feel like you have your own chauffeur driving you around.
🙂 or next time I might be writing from an Asylum 🙂
;=)
Thanks for submitting this neat photo for the Fictioneers… and for the chuckles of the puns. My favorite has to be “goat-el!”
Ever stay at a Goatel 8? They keep the light son for you so you can graze all night.
Wow — I guess you follow the goat-en rule.
“Good one,” complimented de goat.
“And after the Goaten Rule, I be lookin’ for de Goaten Egg.”
if it had only one ear ,it would be vincent van goat.
Rriends, Romans, and Goatrymen – lend me your ears.
Ear-ly to bed, ear-ly to rise – makes a goat healthy, wealthy, and wise.
I love your art work, Vinne boy.
the second story made me chuckle..
so my #2 is your #1!
That has to exhaust every goat line there is.Good goating!
Exhausting telling goat jokes, isn’t it?
Did you hear about the goat that hopped into a bar with a bunny?
too funny
thanks.
Hi Randy,
First of all, thanks for a great photo to write from. Second, thanks for the humor. I’ve noticed here in the south when people say “Go ahead,” it sounds like they are saying goat head. So goat head, make me laugh. Ron
who you calling goat head?
Ha. I hope you do laugh. i love to laugh and have a great time here with humorous anecdotes and responses. it’s all meant in fun and i hope that everyone takes it that way. I have a good time laughing while rereading the comments and responses.
Thanks, Ron
Randy
Thanks for the excellent photo prompt and for inspiring me to write a little humour as well. Loved your piece – very clever!
Couldn’t hold a lamp to your tail.
I mispelled sandwish in my comment on your blog but i actually think that it works better.
Love the humor in your goat tail (tale).
I enjoy dabbling in writing (though I don’t feel I am very good at it – hmmmm isn’t that what all “writers/bloggers” say). I’ve managed to get myself involved in a number of writing challenges (though not all are on a regular basis) and find myself enjoying them immensely. Yours looks like an interesting blog to follow and I’ll do my best to do so
Tena Carr
http://www.jottingsandwritings.wordpress.com
Hi Tena,
if you like the humor from my tail you will love the words to come from my other end. Welcome to Friday Fictioneers. I left a few jots and writings on your webpage. Best wishes, Randy
Preferred the second one. Seems like he was onto a really good thing. Hope the banks lent him money.
The no bonkers mon goinna lend me any money
I liked the first one better because bad puns make me laugh. The second was good too but I’m an animal lover and cannot imagine rearing animals to butcher them. I wonder whether you can actually make a living out of turning your backyard into a graveyard. hahaha
By the way, where did you take the photograph – am so curious.
I took the photos in Jamaica while I was on a cruise. We stopped in port and the graveyard was behind one of the churches that they take you to on one of the tours.
And what you mean bad puns? All my puns are of the highest quality and if you say otherwise I might have to punish you.
And lastly, just for your information, no goats were butchered in a processing of the words that went into the making of either of these two compositions.
Thank you for visiting, Randy
I liked them both. Very interesting and creativity-provoking photo today. Thanks.
Here’s mine: http://unexpectedpaths.com/friday-fictioneers/judas-goats/
Thank you for your positive comments on my riding in the photo. I left my comments on your website. Randy
Dear Randy,
Number two rules the graveyard.
Aloha,
Doug
Hi Doug,
Glad to hear from you. Glad to hear that there is a ruler of the graveyard even if it is number two. Is a number two ruler like a number two pencil?
Best regards, Randy
I liked the second one best. By the way, what is the story behind the photo?
Skip down to me reply to Kalpana.
They are both rich with things to make one laugh Randy. Number two is seriously funny, or maybe that should be unseriously funny. So two gets my vote. Thanks for the photo prompt, brought back a few goat memories for me!
Thanks, Randy
🙂 i like them both. ^^ and thank you for the photo
Thank you, kz
Enjoyed both of these Randy but love the ideas in the second. Turning the backyard into a cemetary is priceless.
until the town finds out that I have no permit for it… Randy