This is a cat’s tale…
Friday Fictioneers – Rochelle Wisoff-Fields posts a pic to write a 100 word story about.
This week it’s:
copyright-scott-l-vannatter
Master and Catmander
Sign the damn paper.
I don’t care if it is Christmas. Just sign.
No, I don’t have a pen. You know I couldn’t pick one up and hand it to you anyway.
Oh? So, you think that’s funny? Funny for me to have to swat a pen over to you.
That’s why I’m doing this. You’ll laugh because my thumbs don’t work like yours. You’re so warped.
Just sign the damn paper. Find a pen, moron.
I’ve had enough of you and your perversity.
Don’t bother reading the terms. You’re Your lawyer already told you to sign it. Just do it.
Randy Mazie
The Writer's Village 
Divorce cat? Devil cat? LOL…a funny take on the prompt. Thanks for the laugh.
Tom
the devil’s (as Janet would say) in the cat’s tales.
Randy
Great story! I caught a typo for you: ‘You’re lawyer already told you to sign it.’ should be ‘Your lawyer already told you to sign it.’
You and Janet get to be witnesses on the paperwork.
Good eye.
randy
Kitty with a lawyer? This is serious! Did I get it right? Good one.
You got it right.
It could have been because of a feline-y that was committed.
Who knows, it’s not a purr-fect world.
A ha!! Very good, sir!!! Thank you.
meow.
Thank goodness kitty won’t be spending the holidays in jail!
he might end up eating a jail bird…. ba-dum-dumb
Or, he could bring it into the house to, you know, show his appreciation. Here’s a lovely dead bird.
like the dead horse head in da guy’s bed from the movie “Godfather’?
– here, sign da papers or you end up like dis dead bird?
that’s a funny image, i think.
Love your title, Randy. I can see the cat trying to hypnotize by gaze, too, with those intense eyes.
(Lose the apostrophe in “You’re lawyer”.)
I command you to have a wonderful Christmas! And if you feel ill from eating too much, drink a cata-tonic. 🙂
I need to drop the apostrophe and the “e” as well. Thanks.
Very cute – the cata-tonic. You are so sharp. Clawingly so.
Merry Christmas to you and Bill and the kids.
Same to you. I’ve been a bit under the punning and bantering weather due to the short turnaround time from Cleveland to Philly and back, a very late night on the drive back, and another late night last night. But as Ahhhnold said, “I’ll be back!!”
I know you will be – you are very industrious, it seems, ambitious, energetic, creative, talented, and bright.
Too little? Too much?
I think just right.
Randy
A determined kitty. Wonder what’s in the document? Probably a huge inheritance such as the millions the “Queen of Mean” left her dog.
Mmmm… the millions the “Queen of Mean” left her dog?
I think I shall get my lawyer involved, too, said the dog, tail a’waggin’.
A cat with a lawyer! Hell’s bells what a deadly duo. Nice one Randy, made me grin.
the cat with a lawyer was kind of cat-hartic device ….
Dear Randy,
CATastrophic story telling. What was your CATalyst? Did you use a CATalytic converter? Well I’m done so I’ll sCAT. Your tail was the cat’s meow.
Purring off,
Rochelle
Ha. Thanks for making my day.
I love when folks play back. Your cat-omments are cat-rific.
I was kind of feeling, in a catty kind of way, un-cat-ered to, if you know what I mean
BTW, it really wasn’t a contract.
It was more like a purr-loined letter.
Randy
That cat would be out the door! But some cat’s are like that, for sure… and of course get their way.
Just sign the paper, Ted.
I think that cat was allowed to watch too much television. Lawyering up. My goodness. What’s the world coming to? LOL. Fun take on the prompt. I enjoyed it. I had a cat divorce me once. He simply refused to ever come back in the house. 😦 There’s a story there, but I won’t go into it.
sorry to hear that… a new twist on the old song “the cat came back the very next day…” Hmmm.
I’ve read several people’s stories on this picture prompt, I love how different they all are! Nice work Randy.
Hi Vanessa,
I think everyone did a great job this week. I, too, really enjoyed all the different spins on the cat.
Randy
Cats and lawyers remind me of Catbert, the evil director of human resources from Dilbert.
Sorry, I haven’t read Dilbert. I think it’s a comic strip? No?
Randy
Yeah, it’s about office life, but the evil one is the cat, although the dog is smart and a bit evil too.
http://search.dilbert.com/comic/Catbert
Thanks. I liked what I read so I signed up for the daily emails. Thanks again. I’m now green
Dear Randy,
I’m the only one who will tell you the truth and even I’m not going to. Merry Christmas.
Aloha,
Doug
wow… that was self-explanatory.
Hi RAndy,
I guess that’s what’s next a pre-nup for your cat. It could deal with all kinds of issues, hairballs, litter boxes, scratching up the furniture, fleas. But what is the cat had a better lawyer? Ha. Ron
Hi Ron,
I like that, a cat pre-nup!
And if the cat had a better lawyer, I end up being the cat’s-sup (meow)
Randy
I’m surprised the cat needed a lawyer. I pretty sure that most of the cat I’ve known could easily pass the bar exam themselves. But cat know their rights… Serve and obey.
Everybody needs a lawyer.
It’s un-American to think otherwise.
Randy
so now we have to wonder what the paper was all about. grrrr. i mean, mmrrowww. well done.
Come on, Rich. Just sign the darn thing. Nobody ever reads the fine print anyways.
I bought a car once from that cat.
Not a hat?
he got everything but my soul.
so you beat the devil at her own game
No, I got a 1978 Toyota Corolla at sticker price.
oh, that explains everything.
stupid tax….
Have a great Christmas
stupid tax?
you have a great Christmas, too!
that’s the tax you pay when you make a dumb mistake.
ok… I’ll bite one last time.
What dumb mistake?
I’m waiting for the pa-dum-dum at the end..
Randy
Another evil cat. Poor cat, he may be a good cat. Loved the story.
Not evil. just wanting justice.