Friday Fictioneers: This is for the Birds

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Posted on July 12, 2012 by The Writer's Village

Each week Friday Fictioneers – Madison Woods posts a pic that begs to have a 100 word story written about it. Click above to see this week’s entries. The pic is reprinted below

My story is printed below. Visit Madison Woods’ site if you’d like to see and/or learn more.

This is for the Birds

Two elderly men on a park bench:

“Buzzard.”
“Who’s a buzzard?
“You are, you old gizzard.”
“Who’s a gizzard?
“You are, you old goat”
“Now you’ve gone too far”
“Too far? You old fart.”
“I accept buzzard and gizzard. They’re in the bird family. But goat is a mammal. And now you’ve called me a smell. You’re mixing your metaphors. Next you’ll call me a shape shifter.”
“You are like a shit shafter.”
“And that’s a simile, moron.”
“Bird brain…. How’s that for a metaphor in the same family? Woodpecker, cuckoo, cockatiel, and silly-assed goose?”
“Okay… you’ve made your point.”

Randy Mazie

41 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers: This is for the Birds”

Kwadwo on July 12, 2012 at 9:51 PM said:

Chuckles. Now that’s funny.
Nice play on words. I like the assonance. The dialogue flows like a poem.

Thanks for passing by to comment on mine.

http://logo-ligi.com/2012/07/12/soliloquy-of-a-disgruntled-raven/

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:50 AM said:
  
  so do you want to cook up some raven-oli for dinner tonight?
  
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  - Kwadwo on July 13, 2012 at 11:12 AM said:
    
    I think I’ll pass for now, given my raven’s temper.
    
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    - The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 5:35 PM said:
      
      uh-oh
      
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Swirling Turnip on July 12, 2012 at 10:06 PM said:

Smile inducing. 🙂

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:47 AM said:
  
  always nice to be induced.
  Or in the never heard words of Groucho Marx, “I may have missed the intro, but it certainly was nice to be induced.”
  Have a happy, Randy
  
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raina on July 12, 2012 at 10:13 PM said:

haha a brilliant fun read 🙂

http://writersclubkl.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/friday-fictioneers-the-river/

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:45 AM said:
  
  Thanks. Nice poem on your site.
  
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  - raina on July 13, 2012 at 6:49 AM said:
    
    Thank you.
    
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sustainabilitea on July 12, 2012 at 10:23 PM said:

Those old geezers just don’t know when to quit, do they? 🙂 What an interesting progression!

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:43 AM said:
  
  progression, shmo-gression. And who an old geezer? And just what makes you such a smarty-pants with a name like sustainabilitea?
  (smile). Thanks for commenting, Randy
  
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  - sustainabilitea on July 13, 2012 at 6:49 AM said:
    
    Fine then, you Tyrant Flycatcher! I’ll take that as you meant it (I hope! 🙂 )
    
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    - The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:53 AM said:
      
      Please do. Randy 😉
      
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boomiebol on July 12, 2012 at 10:24 PM said:

Ha ha very fun take on the prompt…mine is here
http://boomiebol.wordpress.com/2012/07/12/the-new-character-friday-fictioneers-713/

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:39 AM said:
  
  Thanks.
  
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Adam Ickes on July 12, 2012 at 10:32 PM said:

Puts me in mind of the movie Grumpy Old Men.

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:37 AM said:
  
  Yes. Along with the odd couple, I believe it was Arte Johnson from laugh-in, Art Carney and Jackie Gleason, Carl Reiner and Mel Brooks, my Uncle Harry and Uncle Sid, and a few pigeons who dropped a few lines on me as i sat in the park feeding them. Randy
  
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Susan Wenzel (@SusanWenzel) on July 12, 2012 at 11:33 PM said:

Well…I can certainly visualize these two. You painted the picture well. They hide their affection through insults…I love it!

~Susan (www.susanwenzel.com)

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:33 AM said:
  
  Thank you. But you should hear what they have to say about affection for each other.. ha
  
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flyoverhere on July 12, 2012 at 11:38 PM said:

LOL! Loved it!

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:30 AM said:
  
  Thank you. I scooted over to you site and enjoyed your poetic conversation with that ol’ buzzard. Nice piece.
  Randy
  
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Sandra on July 13, 2012 at 2:44 AM said:

Good friends then? Thanks for starting my day with a smile.

http://castelsarrasin.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/every-cloud-friday-fictioneers-july-2012/

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 6:25 AM said:
  
  Yours did too. I left my comments on your site, and I stopped making payments on my mortgage immediately. My wife read your post and is giving me dirty looks. Ouch, she just cuffed my ear. Have a good one, Randy
  
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readinpleasure on July 13, 2012 at 9:56 AM said:

I’m laughing my head off here. Good and imaginative play on words. Well done. mine is here and linked: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/fridayfictioneers-spectators/

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 5:18 PM said:
  
  Glad you enjoyed yourself… I think one the men mentioned that they saw your head going by and worried that one of the buzzards might get to it before you could retrieve it. I liked yours with its open-ended meanings. I made her into the town prostitute, someone had murdered her (an envious wife perhaps)…
  
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Madison Woods on July 13, 2012 at 3:58 PM said:

That was cute. Even without a mention of the two old guys or how they looked, I had a strong visual.

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- The Writers Village on July 13, 2012 at 5:08 PM said:
  
  Hi, glad you stopped by. So you could see them? … did the second guy look like a buzzard or an old gizzard? ‘Cause that guy was me, so be careful how you answer 😉 Randy
  
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  - Claire 'Word by Word' on July 14, 2012 at 8:28 AM said:
    
    He was slower to respond because he is a thinker and the first guy spit when he spoke, he’s got a few issues and it shows in his face. The second guy just a few wrinkles from careful consideration.
    
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    - The Writers Village on July 14, 2012 at 9:44 AM said:
      
      I luv it! Great description.
      The first guy did spit when he spoke.
      The second guy carried tissues for those issues
      which was a careful consideration.
      
      Haha. Fun. Thanks, Randy
      
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Claire 'Word by Word' on July 14, 2012 at 4:21 AM said:

Brilliant, even Grumpy Old Men still play word games or at least one of them does. Very creative and hilarious, the best combination.
http://wp.me/s1nUrn-buzzard

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- The Writers Village on July 14, 2012 at 8:00 AM said:
  
  Thank you for the read and your compliments. How nice! I’ve just come from your curious and peculiar story of the gents carryin’ that long rectangular box from off the table, and glad my buzzards were around long enough to help me write and think outside “the box” for the story as opposed to possibly being “in the box” for the story. So that being said, I see three critters – the body (whatever/whoever it is)in the box, a real buzzard (having been near or circling around the body or bodies), and a dead dog (which one of the gents named Buzzard, but the other gent thinks should been called Bud)… but what do I know, I’m only some old buzzard myself. Thanks again, Randy
  
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  - Claire 'Word by Word' on July 14, 2012 at 8:43 AM said:
    
    Me thinks the she-dog aint dead, but she’s sure got a new owner who could be a good guy or could be something else altogether. Think those two might grow up to be grumpy old mates too.
    
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    - The Writers Village on July 14, 2012 at 9:33 AM said:
      
      yu-up. I think all 5 – my two and yer three – wuld get along might well, grumpily speakin’ tha’ tis.
      
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Claire 'Word by Word' on July 14, 2012 at 8:31 AM said:

It’s worth it to come here to read the replies to all the comments, even more laughs. Going to have to follow now, need a dose of this however often you produce it.

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- The Writers Village on July 14, 2012 at 9:35 AM said:
  
  welcome to the family – no casket needed and feel free to grump as much as you’d like, my new fiend… (ha) Randy
  
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Lady Marilyn Kay Dennis on July 14, 2012 at 8:54 AM said:

They’ve probably been doing that for decades. An original take on the prompt.

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- The Writers Village on July 14, 2012 at 9:28 AM said:
  
  family tradition. Genetic responses going back 6000 years… 😉
  
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flyingscribbler on July 14, 2012 at 10:02 AM said:

I imagine this is how Statler and Waldorf from the Muppets spend their days. When they’re not enjoying a good old fashioned plush toy variety show of course.

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- The Writers Village on July 14, 2012 at 10:25 AM said:
  
  Of course.
  We’ll add them to the list of grumpy old somethings on the stage… the stage coach, of course. Da-da-dum.
  (that is a line from one of their sketches)
  
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The Short Pages on July 31, 2012 at 12:18 PM said:

I couldn’t help but crack a smile! Excellent.

http://theshortpages.wordpress.com/

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- The Writers Village on July 31, 2012 at 5:09 PM said:
  
  Thank you, you short pager, you! 😉
  
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